Monday, February 28, 2011

GOAT PROVERBS







"When the big tree falls the goat will eat the leaves."
~African Proverb

"If the goat had a longer tail he could wipe the stars clean."
~Czech Proverb



"When the onesie gets too small it's time to return to the barn."
~Goat Borrower Proverb

Thursday, February 24, 2011

Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Caprine Smile


A River of Stones Post #16
"Lawrence the goat went to his knees this day, face raised to the heavens, caprine smile, appreciating fully the sun."


This was my favorite small stone of the AROS challenge.
I wasn't able to capture the actual moment I wrote about but
Lawrence obliged me this past weekend by praying in the sun once again.
Lawrence loves the sun.
I love Lawrence.


*You can read more of my Stones at: www.collagepirate.blogspot.com
Or click on the AROS icon on my page to find out more about the challenge and the upcoming book.

The Goat Poop

Peek-a-boo.....wake up, wake up.........

This having a goat is exhausting

My rumba pants!

Ok. I'll run really, really fast and this time you follow me right down those stairs.......seriously, it'll be fun...

Na-na-na-na-na.....BATMAN!

Froggie-went-a-courtin' jammies

SUN-day nap

52 degrees on Friday.
5 degrees on Saturday.
Freezing today.

Darla remains.

You'd think I would have more to report but I don't.
Life with Darla has settled into a pleasant routine and I relish the weekends when I can stay home and snuzzle and laugh at the freezing winds outside.

Saturday's Hoof Extravaganza was a challenge for me. Turns out I'm an excellent head holder/comforter but not ready to snip anything yet.

Mostly I'm just sick of the cold. Oh, how I long for some green.

Friday, February 18, 2011

FARM FRIEND FRIDAYS at VERDE FARM


http://www.verdefarm.com/2011/02/farm-friend-friday_17.html

Please check out FARM FRIEND FRIDAYS at the Verde Farm!
Most excellent writes! You'll enjoy them all!
And my thanks to them for inviting me even though I
don't really have a farm.

So I'm Blow Drying the Goat's Butt......


THINGS I NEVER IMAGINED I'D DO

BUFF DARLA

DARLA THIS WEEK

SEVERAL WEEKS AGO...WHEN WE WERE STILL SKINNY...AND THE CAT WAS STILL ALOOF

So, I'm blow drying the business end of the goat this morning and I'm thinking:

A. This is not a sentence I ever thought I'd have occasion to write.

and

B. Who would have ever thought that a goat would let you do something like that?

But animals are amazing, aren't they? They'll do just about anything to please you as long as they feel safe and understand what it is you want from them.

From almost the get-go Darla has accepted the fact that tubby means changing.
She stands still, picks up her feet to the words "stepy-stepy" and knows there's a scritching and a snuzzle at the end. The blow dryer came after, after I didn't return Farmer's goat "next Tuesday" and I knew that I was going to have to be diligent regarding hygiene. We started out by just playing with it, graduated to turning it on away from the tubbie and then finally butt success. No issues, really. Amazing.

In fact, I am amazed at every turn how very few issues there have been in keeping a goat at an undisclosed location.

Oh, there was the time the dog, in no uncertain terms clearly said aloud in an appalled voice: "Madame, that is my penis. And I will thank you to stop treating it otherwise." But he tries to herd her and guards her 'barn' and I know he's going to miss her when she goes.

And, though I can't prove it, I'm pretty sure I know how the Stairs Incident occurred.

The cat, who couldn't stand ignoring us any longer, is now Morning Goat Play Buddy.....up to and including leading Darla a merry chase.......right to the top of the stairs....and down. To her credit Darla puts on the brakes like Wile E. Coyote every time but I still cringe when I hear thundering hoof and paw overhead.

And the craft corner. The bane of my goat world existence. I have tried everything imaginable to discourage the pilfering of this corner. Distraction, removal, idle threats to the point where I noticed she only went there when I would sit down at night with a cup of coffee. Ah-ha. Maa will get up and chase me if, and only if, I go to this corner. She's fine if I gum everything else in the house but for some human reason this corner is off limits. Hmmmm.

Sooooo.......I had to go to my last resort.......my final, desperate act: The Gypsy Coin Torture.

The Gypsy Coin Torture is quite effective. And the method is simple.
Insert gypsy coins into plastic coffee can. Shake at appropriate moment. Watch goat go straight up in air. See goat return to corner. Repeat. See goat run. See goat stop. See goat do related math on scratch paper with borrowed pencil. Watch as light bulb goes on over goat's head. See goat begin to return to corner. Simply reach for Gypsy Torture Can. Watch goat run in opposite direction. Viola!

It's funny about animals. All the experts tell us they don't think logically. Ha. Anyone who has ever lived with a pet knows different.

I watch Darla grow and am so happy to see her healthy and I'm proud of how smart she is. This morning during bottle time the cat, no lightweight, walked completely underneath her! I guess I don't remember when she grew up on me.

We'll be returning to the barn soon. (I know...I know....we really are, I promise!) This experience couldn't be bought. Nor can it be duplicated, for should I do it ever again the wonder and discovery wouldn't be quite so fresh. This was special.

I'll really cherish this time, this time when my kingdom truly was peaceable.

~Mimi

Attention: No goats were tortured in an effort to keep them from ingesting six foot of quality yarn, several fabric scraps and a half dozen pewter buttons. It's just the name that's effective.
;)

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

Billy Goat Geordie lands part in Hobbit movie


Billy Goat Geordie lands part in Hobbit movie

Thanks to Darcy for sharing this with me and always thinking of me when she sees a goat.

I'm glad that Geordie gets his just dues. And I have some serious whup-arse for those spray paint vandals. Though I'm a wee bit skeptical about the 20 years part. I hope that his owner stays close to him during the filming and everyone does their best to make Geordie feel at ease. I always thought the beard was the best part of a goat so that makes Geordie one heck of a handsome boy! :)

I'm thinking Darla would make a great Capitol One goat! Nam-a-nam-a-nam-a-nam-a-aaaaaaa!

Monday, February 14, 2011

Friday, February 11, 2011

Everyone Should Have a Pair of Love-Monkey Pants!

And after I pack my basket we're going shopping in my new love-monkey pants!

I'm not moving my toe. Well, I'm not moving my toe either.
You don't have toes. MO-OOOOOOM!


Hey-ho Fellow Goaties!

We have been very remiss in our blogging these days.
I must admit that last weekend I left my laptop at work and went
"old fashioned" all weekend and will probably do it again for this!
There's something to be said for being Mimi: Unplugged.

I have been having such a wonderful time with Darla and my Forever Animals.
My house is so peaceful and calm. (believe it or not!)

Oh, there's the 10 pm ballet lessons through the living room furniture and the midnight tap & jazz class on the bare kitchen floor. And I've witnessed more than several goat races at 3am. But overall the experience has been positive, happy and (mostly) stress free.

My Forever Animals deserve a huge HUZZAH! for opening their home, space, hearts and love to a wayward goat-sister. I'm so proud of them. Their ability to share has been unbelievable. I love them so.

We almost went back to the barn last Saturday in the sunshine but today we have a -6 temp. That's probably my biggest stress factor: this bloody weather.

But, if I've learned anything it's that things, if not poked and manipulated, work out to their best advantage so I guess when the time to go back to the barn is right the Universe will give both Darla and I a nudge. Or a crocus. Or mayhap a tulip. Or something that isn't frozen solid.

It has made me feel so good to see her outgrowing her wee outfits at such an alarming rate. I had thought at one point she would not thrive. We are eating sweet grain now and have had no digestive issues. (ie: poop is perfect!)

And if we just happen to be doing it all in a snazzy pair of love-monkey pants well....hey....look who you're talking to! Personally I think the world would be a better place if everyone had a pair of love-monkey pants. Don't you?

What an experience, eh?

It's been easier with you all along for the Wild Ride! I mean that.

We promise to check in eventually but we saw a new onesie in the window we simply *must* have!

xox
~Mimi & Darla & Yellow Dog & Pooter

Monday, February 7, 2011

A Post- It Note from Darla

Woot! Woot! Naked tubby time! Weeeeeeee!

That big dog leave crumbs everywhere! *yum*

I saw this on page 51 of the new Spring line-up.


My New Barn. I think the cat is jealous. *hee-hee*

My Going Home coat. Out grew my warm pirate coat.

Maa very busy.
I'm still here.
I have a new barn.
My going home coat is done.
I thought I *was* home.
The dog leaves tasty crumbs.
Maa thinks sweet grain is better.
I think not.
Don't forget milk.
love-
~D.

Thursday, February 3, 2011

OF CAPRA AND THE SEA

The Historic Collection

The precious fishnet

What was inside the fishnet: A wee baby cap.


Ahoy Friends!

Darla and I are doing well but we are negligent bloggers are we not?

But rest assured, we're still going strong it's just that life gets in the way of living (and blogging!) sometimes. So stay tuned for more Darla Tales to come!

I have a Capra box to share this day that arrived the other day and was filled with a most wondrous bounty of treasure! I can only say to read the letter reposted (with permission) below. I will freely admit to being humbled at this grand gift and got a wee tear at the line: Do what you may with it-it is yours now.

The box held such grand history of sailors and life and death and the sea and wee babes, long since taken by the waters, who I feel somehow are now in my care.

I am humbled beyond words. I am honored that such a gift should be mine.
The history, energy, love and life in this package is overwhelming.

For those of you who might wonder, I am a pirate in my Other Life so this package had
particular meaning. You can read all about that if you like at www.mimifoxmorton.blogspot.com

But whether goats or pirates, I adore a good tale....and this one has touched my heart. I bow to the sender.

My thanks to all of you have given a scrap of your life to the Capra Project.
Surely the combined energy will be felt for a long time to come. I hope to one day return the gesture to you all.

Stay tuned for Hawaiian sails and Gothic lace in the next Capra post.

Have a magical and creative day!
~Mimi
xoxoxoxox


*************************************


Dear Mimi,

I have coveted this scrap long enough and feel the need to pass it on to a kindred spirit that has a love of the sea and an old tale. It came to me with an assortment of my great grandmother's sewing archives. Tucked away carefully amongst her tools was this tiny bit of fishnet. It was customary for sailors to carry a talisman with something from home for good luck as they ventured out on the seas. I untied a single knot and left it free for you to do the same so you can see the precious bit of home that one of her men or boys tied up inside and carried over the waves close to his heart for many years. She married a man that was a sailor and ship builder like his ancestors for generations and bore him 7 sons. She lived to see them all die on the waters. This is the token so carefully saved by the widow Susan Collins Veltman, 112 Ocean Ave. Bay Shore, NY. She was born the year that Lincoln was inaugurated. Do what you may with it-it is yours now.

Also find enclosed:

Some of her hand tatted lace and crocheted lace. I wouldn't hesitate to soak it in some tepid water with a little whitener and it should clean up fairly well or keep it vintage if you choose.

A hand crocheted collar made by my Mom.

Also some older collars that I thought you or a friend might use as patterns as they are the real deal. My grandmother always dresses in black and changed the white collars and cuffs daily-her ghost is regularly seen in the old family ship yard paint storage room that used to be her kitchen and she is always dressed in this manner.

Happy Sewing
Sue
Oswego, NY